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I had a chance to travel ‘home’ this weekend. I put the word home in quotes for, well to be honest I don’t really know. I’ve found myself in a strange place in life lately. I have my own home, a dog, a boyfriend I love and plan to spend the rest of my life with. And still I find myself longing for a place, that I spent a majority of my formative years clinging to the hope that I would get the hell out of there one day.
Now home is what you make it, this I know. And we’re doing pretty well with making a home for ourselves. I think really most of it is that I wish I had someone from my family that I saw on any form of regular basis with whom I could share my accomplishments, invite over for dinner, and come over to see the newest thing Black Jack has chewed up. But I don’t.
I have started to listen to A LOT of country music lately. I started listening to it a few years ago, but lately its all I listen to.
It makes me feel at home. Its what I grew up with in the background of my life. Something I never felt any particular attachment to but, now seem to find a way that almost every song applies to my life. All because I equate cowboy hats, and Garth Brooks, with South Jersey, and growing up.
These silly things I never thought I’d miss are what I long for the most now.
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